You ever wonder why computers don’t work in the movies the same way they work in reality? Here are some things we noticed:
– Word processors never display a cursor.
– You never have to use the space-bar when typing long sentences.
– All monitors display inch-high letters.
– High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA, or some such governmental institution, will have easy-to-understand graphical interfaces.
– Those that don’t will have incredibly powerful text-based command shells that can correctly understand and execute commands typed in plain English.
– Corollary: You can gain access to any information you want by simply typing “ACCESS ALL OF THE SECRET FILES” on any keyboard.
– Likewise, you can infect a computer with a destructive virus by simply typing “UPLOAD VIRUS.” (See “Fortress”)
– All computers are connected. You can access the information on the villain’s desktop computer, even if it’s turned off.
– Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or whenever the screen changes. Some computers also slow down the output on the screen so that it doesn’t go faster than you can read. The *really* advanced ones also emulate the sound of a dot-matrix printer.
– All computer panels have thousands of volts and flash pots just underneath the surface. Malfunctions are indicated by a bright flash, a puff of smoke, a shower of sparks, and an explosion that forces you backward.
– People typing away on a computer will turn it off without saving the data.